Changing job not yet line

To add to my 2010 stuff that I do... finally I decided to change company after 5 years at the same group. My last day will be end of June. I'm not sure if it a good move or not. The last few weeks I'm in my confused zone as there is so many ppl talk to me with different view. I gave them my reason and I think I gave everyone of them might different2 reason depends on my mood & my thought that time. All of the reason I gave them is true but one might weight more than the others. Depends on my mood of the day, the weight will be different...heehehe. Most of the time, all of them regards me as someone who know what she want , have some BIG plan ahead but the truth is .. I just simply want to change. I'm not sure if I'll like what I'll be doing next but it didnt sound bad. I dont want to move to next project in my group as just by thinking of working in that project make me MALAS & irritated. I dont want to trap in this mode. The only option is for me to move. My current project is good & I kind of kesian to them also that I leave it before it really end. But I know, it just a matter of time before I'll be suck into next project.

Anyway .. among all those ppl who talk to me.. there is one manager that I respect most although it the first time I talk to him & he nearly make me change my decision. I think Malaysia need more people like him. Maybe next time i shared what he has talk to me... sebab mau tido..

Insha Allah

saw abt Maher Zain kat taha's facebook status & somehow I landed in this song. A very deep meaning song. Sometimes aku rasa it is easy when you feel you in darkness or lost or at the down side sebab you will try to find the lights. It is a curse for people who feel nothing or comfortable in their life. Will never occured to them to find the lights.. They will just lost in their own world. I think i'm in the second group. I start to feel comfortable with my life.. it has been routine. I stop doing my reading & searching as i too overwhelm with the world comfortness. It scary..

Death

I feel disturbed... my neighbour passed away hari ni. Baru je hari ahad dia tegur cakap kena makan yg sihat kalau nak hidup lama. Jgn makan ajinomoto, kicap etc... but he already gone. Time & death wait for nobody... Rasa sedih jugak bila pikir parents sendiri..

kiss the A**

hahahaha ... i was laughing bila baca news ni...

http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2010/4/11/nation/6034796&sec=nation

wonder how the boy got such idea... Anyway .. ironic nya .. the same boy if he got no Yang mulia, xkan dilayan utk buat lawatan.. x kan direspect sampai nak panggil state assembly.. wont get the privillege he got masa visit tu .. but yet because a letter, he was treated differently..

chase your dream

hari ni lepak ngn member kat jemputree. We talking2 .. and tetiba termasuk cete masa zaman sekolah. One of my friend yg gi US, dia cete la that she was lucky being chosen as her english wasnt that good back then. Tiba2 teringat zaman sekolah. Ppl who know me since sekolah sure ingat yg my english was very very bad. I can't speak english for conversation at all. ( ye la ni pun x le english berabuk but at least somebody can understand what i try to say in office). After trial, there are a lots of big2 company yg datang to my school cari candidate utk scholarship. As my trial result was ok so my name was on the interview list. Masa tu ada proton, esso, pnb, sime darby, telekom .. and many more. i attend those interview but as expected i didnt impress them at all. Ye la dah la senyap.. x pandai cakap lak. Really feel down masa tu. My "down" peak was when i got interview for petronas. Masa tu after SPM so the interview was held in Johor. Ada 5 org kot in each session n mix with other ppl. Apa lagi .. memang x bercakap la. I just ternganga tgk org cakap. I can't even think what to say. I really cry after that and rasa memang xde harapan nak blaja oversea. Anyway after SPM result keluar, I got a letter from Mara. They just introduce SPC and they selecting ppl utk program tu so they ask me to go for briefing. Masa tu aku dah dapat offer UTM. Deep down in my heart I want to further my study kat oversea tapi dek kerana pengalaman silam interview, i didnt go to the briefing. There are time that i'm asking .. what IF i go for the briefing but I always make excuses that UTM might be the best choice for me and masa tu dah bayar yuran UTM la .. Tiba2 hari ni it struck me that my BIG regret is for NOT trying to chase my dream. I got the opportunity but i back off before I even know the result sebab takut kan failure. It is no harm if I attend the briefing. I may not get in ( maybe the only girl yg x dapat) but at least I have try. I might still go to UTM but at least I went to UTM after i went through the SPC path.. but what I did i make a u turn.. :(. Looking back, I was like that all the time. Am I too vulnerable that I'm afraid of failure. What if i fail for the first, second, third or even zillionth time.. Am my pride is too high that it hurt to get a failure. I hope I can change and I really glad that I found my BIG regret today as I can't find any excuses of this regret... So I should not do it again as I know there is no excuses....

Blind side

emm sgt suke la cete blind side ni. Sedih n terharu. I wonder if i able to do like what Leigh Anne buat kat big Mike. Malas nak tulis summary so i copy & paste.. see it if you have time..

Based on the true story of Leigh Anne and Sean Tuohy who take in a homeless teenage African-American, Michael "Big Mike" Oher. Michael has no idea who is father is and his mother is a crack head. Michael has had little formal education and few skills to help him learn. Leigh Anne soon takes charge however, as is her nature, ensuring that the young man has every opportunity to succeed. When he expresses an interest in football, she goes all out to help him, including giving the coach a few ideas on how best to use Michael's skills. They not only provide him with a loving home, but hire a tutor to help him improve his grades to the point where he would qualify for an NCAA Division I athletic scholarship. Michael Oher was the first-round pick of the Baltimore Ravens in the 2009 NFL draft

contact lens

This few week, saya telah mentry pakai contact lens. Motif ? Sebab nak pakai sunglasses besar beli gi redang .. hahahah ( i loike my new sunglasses). Ye ..mcm poyokan .. but cita2 saya nak jadi vogue dalam masa 5 tahun ... ( uhhh ..tapi half year has gone tapi cam xde apa2 vogue d boom :( ). anyway masa gi kenduri kawan, aku pakai la contact lens tu n ada lah gambar yg diambik. I showed to my sis photo yg telah ku zoom ke bahagian muka.. tanya dia dia pelik x mata aku. Tau la kan.. beli org yg sokmo pakai spec tukar ke lense, we have the tendency of mata terjojol.. so my sister tgk n dia cakap.. ha ah.. pelik. mcm hidung k.mah nak terkuar.. she said .. weird but maybe after sometimes will be ok. then after tu dia dok belik gambar2 dalam kamera aku n said " emm.. adik rasa k.mah x yah risau mata k.mah weird .. i think perut k.mah lagi pelik... ppl will see your tummy more than your face." .. DANGGGGG... siott kan..