July 03, 2016

camera ....sssss

Even to write this make me laugh. When i think back, every year since 2014 I have new camera. I used to have lx3 which i love so much.. but eventually it slowly giving in.. i started to hate it... the end is during my TMBT in 2013. I have to cross a river and goes that camera. It still can be use but no more giving a sharp photo. Then I bought canon s100 in 2014 before my US trip. Kind of regret because the camera had battery issue. I should read the forum before i buy it... I didn't really took photo during US trip because every time i took it out, after like 2 mins it will give no battery indicator. When i charge it still full. I send back to the shop, it getting better but will be the same at cold place aka winter. Then 2015.. i bought a gopro before the german trip. It was one of the best investment i guess. It so nice and I have lots of photo of me and the scenery of course. The fish eye give different perspective of landscape :p.  I tot that will be the end of my camera collection.. but wait .. tetiba gatal nk beli slr kan.. hahahaha... it all started masa iceland trip. I cannot get nice aurora photo with my gopro.. kind of dissapointed :(. The the desire is slowly build up. When in KL, while watching movie with cikpah there is slr advertisement. I told her i want to buy slr.. and she laugh (maybe) but she said she don't think i will like it or use it or like to bring it.. (i don't even bring my gopro during lombok trip because 2 of them already brought an action camera.. so what the point kan..) . Arghh .. no approval.. i need to find a reason or someone to sokong me.. and then suddenly i saw there is a short class on digital photography in edinburgh that i think i should join.. but the problem is .. it require u to have slr.. OMG.. i have to buy ..i have to buy...  So here  i'm welcoming the d3300 to my collection right before my next trip. I hope i will use more and will not become tukun. The reason why this kind of funny to me because I'm not a hard core photographer. I took some photo during travel but i love more to just lying around or walking.. Lots of time during my travel with the stooges i will leave them taking photo while me enjoy my time walking around.. hahahaha.. even if i took photo i normally will just keep in the memory card.. it will take ages for me to upload or give to them. If i'm lucky cikpah will help to upload it.. I did some thought about my laziness of taking photo..  I think the reason why i don't like to take photo because mine wasn't come out nice .. it just make me frustrated. So i just like to enjoy my time. If somehow i can capture nice photo i guess I will eager to share it.. So let hope i can improve my photography skill rather my shopping skill .. hahaha. but again i'm a shopaholic.. maybe all just a reason.

June 28, 2016

Menses n ramadhan

Recently viral la plak pasal this lady yg purposely eating in restaurant during ramadhan n kena harassed with other muslim folk. She was doing that on purpose to fight for the right of mense women to eat without any shame.  To be honest ... I'm with her side. The shocked part for me, wasnt that she being harrased but emm almost all my facebook friend which are mostly girls are against her. And the comment on her post doesnt show that those people actually respect ramadhan although doing pong pang pong pang ckp she didn't respect ramadan.

To be honest, for me not eating in restaurant, never really abt respect the ramadhan or people who fasting. People who fasting won't be in cafe anyway so it never really about respecting the people.. The worker maybe fasting but they actually aware they are working in cafe right.. Anyway that not the point... the main thing, ramadan itself is a holy month not only for you not eating and drinking.. it more bigger than that. We hv to banyak2 bersabar. For you to harass people during ramadhan, do you really think that act is to show respect to ramadan?  Beside that i really think all of us are not respecting ramadhan as it should be. We spend lots of money in baju raya la kasut raya la barang2 raya la. If we really respect ramadhan we should control our shopping desired. We also buy and cook lot of dishes which is really a waste. One normal meal should be more than enough.  Tapi ketamakan beli murtabak la, bihun goreng la.. kuih muih.  If we so respect the ramadan, we will not have pasar ramadan mcm cendawan tumbuh or bazar raya. Those are really againts the ramadan's value. So should we blame someone who entitled not to fast, that she not respecting ramadhan by eating in a restaurant while we encourage and even approve the raya sales and shopping? But again, our community always mixed up the priority. Babi is so haram while duit kopi is normal as long we dont kena saman or to expediate any payment. Don't quran say we can eat pork during emergency but there is none in quran said u can accept bribe or taking orphan money. I know lots of people will not agree with me... but before you bash or x puas hati maybe just for a second really think, what really the reason we angry with her.. Before we labelling her, think about ourselves. How much has we respect ramadan this year... Even after you think about it and you still not agree, i think rather than put labelling status what so ever, maybe talk to her and understand her point of view. You will be surprise how 2 different thing can be true in different view.
 I was brought up to be shame of having my mense. Even to buy pad is kind of shame. I remember i use to wrap the pad with paper every time i buy it. It slowly change when i get older, although now i still slightly conscious to buy in front of guys that i know but i don't care if i dont know them.   always dream of a day where i have courage to eat in cafe during ramadhan rather than starve myself. i normally will have headache on my first day of mense during ramadhan. Maybe lack pf water etc. but i just dont have "ball" to do it. If i really cant tahan, i will drive back and buy roti to eat at home or eat in car. Even to eat in cubicle pun rasa segan takut org lalu. I suffered for something  wasn't even a sin to begin with..I just felt shame that people know that i'm having my mense. Is it wrong to have my menses? No.   I know lots of my friend suffer the same thing.. we rela to curi2 makan when people didn't see it rather that having a normal meal. I don't think anyone should be a shame of it.. although to be honest, it so hard to break through. Even now, I'm in UK, i still think should i eat in cafe during my menses? Later what should i tell my colleague? What will people say ... YES that one of the main thing.. we so afraid utk org cakap apa. We so mold to society... even in my mind, the shopping is even worst than eating in public in term of menghormatkan ramadan, nobody give a damn when u shop.....

June 27, 2016


OI saw one post in facebook that someone post a photo of a stretch of shop closing and some even have closing sign. He claimed fhat this what economic suffering look like. To be honest this what sunday look like in uk my dear. Hahahah. Although i browse the comment roughly he did kind of requote in the comment this what the economic suffering will look like not that this place actually suffered economy. First of all i really thing this photo is way too misleading. So tempting nak comment kat facebook tapi nanti viral lak. Nanti aku kena ckp stupid kan. Hahaha let me be stupid in my blog.  Sometimes ppl try to deny the economy suffering with so many ppl shopping, so many ppl buy fareeda etc. Although x deny those maybe shows people are earning good money to be able to afford luxury items but at the same time we have to know how many people can actually save their salary by end of the month? Those ppl might actually in debt with credit card. Is that shows a good economy? For me .. In my stupid kampung view.. A good economy means you can afford necessary items with your minimum wages. Nobody need to steal or need to beg just to eat. Ppl should have some amount of money to save at the end of the month. In uk although some of stuff is expensive like daun curry but overall raw materials is cheap. You can get terung from 49p. Chicken part 1kg for 3pound. 1 quarter chicken yg dh siap marinate is 1.25pound.  5kg of basmathi rice is 5 pound. If your staple food potatos lagi murah la kan. Less than 1 pound boleh dpt bag of potatoes. Of course kalau nk makan tempe it 2pound but who eat tempe everyday :).  In malaysia kalau aku beli 1/4 chicken kat pasar satu part is rm4, then sayur selalu beli stock seminggu dh rm20. 5kg beras  dh lebih rm10 ke rm20. Lupa dh. So seminggu even normal food, the raw material dh lebih 60. So in uk one week is like 14pound and in malaysia is like 50rm. But min wage in malaysia is way lower than uk. When i first come to penang , one laksa was RM1.50 .. and right before i left one bowl of laksa is now RM3.50.  Last time you can get ikan kembong for RM1.50-RM3 per kg.. Now 1kg min is RM6... My salary when i first started working is RM2700 and after more than 14 years the fresh grad salary in my industry is around RM3300-RM3500.., but all the basic stuff has increase almost double. So is really our economy is doing good?
Min wages for malaysia a month : RM1000. So if we work 26 days and 8 hours per day, it will be RM4.70 per hour. In UK, min wages is 6.70 pound. Of course the rent here is more expensive but it comparable dollar to dollar whereby our min wages is not comparable dollar to dollar. Doesn't matter how i look at it, despite so many people are buying fareeda & duckscarves, there will be people are suffering with this kind of cost.

May 15, 2016

Tipoo Sultan

When i was in Bangalore i visited a palace on the way to Mysore. It was Tipoo Sultan palace. The name attracted me because in Malay, the sound similar like tipu which means cheating. So it kind of funny to know that someone's name sound like  "tipu". But somehow when i read abt Tipoo sultan in that palace and from wiki, it give me some kind of mixed feeling. He was brave that is for sure.. He and his father just normal people but they managed to raise as important ruler during that time. He did lots of thing to develop MySore. He also seems to be a good in war, wins lots of war. He is a muslim. Some said he did donation to temple under his ruling and he also don't mind of listening to both bells from temple and azan from mosque nearby his palace but at the same time he did a force conversion of Hindu people to Muslim which and based on what I read it merely due to power not because of religion itself. This is one person that I don't know know to what i felt against him. However what that strike me most is event happen before his down fall. The British was cornered him, and his advisor asked him to escape using some escape route but he against it and said "One day of life as a Tiger is far better than thousand years of living as a Sheep". So he stand there and fight with the British and was killed. It kind of sad ending. Today I spent some times visiting scotland national gallery.. Guess what did I found? Tipoo sultan's painting. This time it was at different perspective. It shows a guy so proud of killing Tipoo sultan.  Ironic kan.

April 25, 2016

Another chapter of life

Insya allah something new will happen to my life next year. I promised my friend to wrote down every details of it. I blogged abt chasing aurora end of last year. I wrote that i was going for travel that wasn't in my travel plan at all. I doesn't like winter & cold but fate divert me to Iceland when my project got cancel and I have friend that planning to go to Iceland during that time. Even for my friend, the initial plan was to spend thanksgiving on train ride across US but it was change to Iceland due to some advertisement pop up that make my friend believe that was a sign. What sign exactly, at that time we don’t know. That happen somewhere in Jun/July which I always tease my friend maybe there will be a real “aurora” there.

There were few route to Iceland and I end up choose stopover in Edinburgh as one of my close friend when i was in Penang just started her PHD there. I remember my promise to send her off in KL but due to work, i didn't. So I decided to pay her visit. Initially i plan to land in London as it has cheaper flight fare & I so wanted to run in Hyde park ( One of the thing i regret not doing during my UK time), but due to limited time, hassle to go to airport, I decided just stop at Edinburgh. So all planned and booked.

 A few days before my departure date, I got to know about a colleague who got a job in UK. I wasn’t close with him so I didn’t know where he go. Somehow during lunch break another friend gossip about that and I got the company name. I did try to apply for a UK job last 2 years when i decided to move from my previous company. However the results wasn’t favour me and to be honest at that time i wasn’t ready. I want to go because I have a very close friend that got job there and I envy him but at the same time my heart still doesn’t want to go. It not want I really want. I still love my new house, i doesn’t want to experience the loneliness.. yadayada.. Anyway mid last year after German trip, the desire to go out from Malaysia to experience new life is increasing. During a medical checkup, I got to know that I had a small tumour in my liver. After further evaluation, it diagnose as not cancerous. But the experience of going through that make me realise I wasn’t fully utilise my life. Allah is so kind to give me reminder that anything can happen, that tumour can be cancerous. So after come back from German, I did try to apply to either UK or europe job.. but NIL. All required me to have working visa. I kind of give up and follow the flow of my current life. So when I know this guys got a job in UK, so I know that company is willing to give visa sponsorship. So that night, i went home, being a curious little girl as I am, i google the website. Found, click the career link and i saw there still have opening. The opening is in Edinburgh and I’m going to Edinburgh. What a coincidence. A day before my departure date I was working late to enable some checks. While waiting for my simulation to complete, i update my resume and applied for the job. That just about 1 day before my departure date.
I remember during that period that I really want to change. I even register for Germany class while waiting for my flight so that it ease me to get job in German which some of friend said no need, because germany speak english but I don’t care. I just want to close any gap that I might have.
So when i reach Edinburgh, i got an email for THE company. Asking what is my contact number so that they can call me for interview. I replied the email and he arranged an hour phone interview the week after because I had to travel to Iceland plan the next day. In Iceland, i met my friend and told and even show my friend the email that I got (excitedly). After not seeing each other for like 9 months, what i got was a “SCOLD”. My friend was so angry at me on how I replied the email and the fact that I settled with phone interview when next week I actually in Edinburgh and the company are in Edinburgh and as bonus — I’m bad at conversation. So I had to re-write and re-send my reply to ask if they want to see me face to face instead. The interviewer was so kind to arrange my onsite interview and it just happen the hiring Manager was on site on the schedule date. So that guy help to re-arrange 3 interview back to back for me. 
The interview went well.. and i got the job. It was so unexpected. I guess this is what Allah plan for me. He know my little heart desire, my fear & my doubt. He only grant it when i’m ready and really want it. So far, except for my house, the whole process has been smooth and easy. My mom was staying with me most of the time but due to this changes in my life, she has to go back home town for now and coincidently my younger sis who currently stay there, got her new house. So she moving out her stuff out from my mom’s house so my mum can has a comfortable time when she in Malaysia.
I hope and pray my life in Edinburgh will give a different meaning and bring a different perspective of life.